10 Reasons the UEFA CL Final was a great result

| Nick Clemons

10 reasons why this was a great result

  1. Most obviously because Manure lost of course which is always a wondrous sight to behold.
  2. Manure didn’t become first team to retain the Champions League in its current format.
  3. To provide us with an enduring image of sour faced whisky nose realising he has nothing to blame other than his own team’s inadequacies
  4. To wipe the smile off the so-called World Footballer of the Year when he has just been eclipsed by a true great called Lionel Messi
  5. To prove that although money can buy you success in the league it can’t guarantee you success in Europe as Manure have found out many times (Compare league titles to European wins over the last 15 years)
  6. They are still 5-3 down to us in European Cup/Champions League victories
  7. Manure don’t get quite as much money to add to their already overflowing coffers which reduces (albeit slightly) their buying power in the transfer market
  8. Those Liverpool fans (and believe me there are some) who actually wanted Manure to win may now realise how close they came to being sectioned under the Mental Health Act
  9. Some of the media may actually realise that perhaps whisky nose is not the greatest manager ever to walk the earth just because he can spend £30M on one player every single year
  10. To uncover a rare piece of footage where Manure fans actually admit they were beaten by a better team (keep this and sell it in future as a rare item)

20 songs to listen to on your Ipod tomorrow

1- Beautiful Day – U2

2- Just Can’t Get Enough – Depeche Mode

3- Messy but Good – B.B. King

4- I could be Happy – Altered Images

5- The Beaten Generation – The The

6- I’ve Had the Time of My Life – Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes

7- Unexpected Delight – Flying Lotus

8- Oh Yeah – Yello

9- Always Look on the Bright Side of Life – Monty Python

10- Let’s Have a Party – Elvis Presley

11- Ha Ha – All Saints

12- Good Life – Inner City

13- I Love Rome – Asha Puthli

14- What a Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong

15- You Made my Day – The Welcome Wagon

16- Celebration – Kool & The Gang

17- Top of the World – Carpenters

18- Mr Blue Sky – ELO

19- Ray of Light – Madonna

20- We love you Barca we do. Oh Barca we love you – Anyone

6 comments on
10 Reasons the UEFA CL Final was a great result

  5. Nick, I have to agree with your ten points, all be it with slight twist. Being permanently suspicious of the red-faced buffoon and his band of egomaniacs, I reckon he watched Chelsea’s outstanding display of temper tantrums and bad sportsmanship, and said to his team “If we lose, don’t have a strop, try to act with dignity, otherwise we’ll give everyone else yet another reason to hate us.”

    You could see by his face, his admission that Barcelona were the better side, was unbelievably painful. Especially for a man who thinks he has a god given right to win everything, just by his team turning up and considering he still believes Manure were better on the day, having been thrashed 4-1 by us – as we know he vary rarely accepts defeat graciously.

    I reckon his good grace at the end of the final was yet another PR stunt by an over-rated, arrogant, sore loser, at a time when he had very little option to say anything else, having been so soundly beaten by a much better team.

    Reply

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